Back home..

Dear Friends,

Ive been away, 4 days cut off from all that is home! And it felt AWESOME! For once i was a nobody. i was lost in a sea of faces just like the song of Kutless. Here im a someone. Im Ben the sound man of Y4J the big tall guy who drives a van.. i have an identity, a family, friends and a job.

But who am i? or rather who am i meant to be? Its a question which i ask myself constantly... who is Ben.. and yet i have no answer

I learnt to love myself as God has made me with all my "diffetti" and all but what is He making me into?

In London, the place really didnt impress me, its only stone, bricks and years of history.. ok it was nice.. but the poor sleeping outside in the rain and cold.. what about those?
Is it fair?
I dont care if i become rich, have a steady job or a family if there are millions who still sleep outside, and all we do is pass by them and forget them..

I was thinking today about most of the young guys at y4j, how ive seen them grow in the past few year into real Men of God.
Will we just walk by the broken? will these men do something? are we willing to be change? Ready to give it all up for the kingdom?

One thing which impressed me at the concert was this:
During one of the songs i cant remember which a guy (a) stood on his friend (b) shoulder and sang along cheering the crowd and really into it. Martin Smith was like :O ... But what impressed me was that B was giving A the glory role by submitting for his friend and serving him in carrying....

Imagine if we know someone who we know God has called him to be a preacher ezempju... do we pray for him,support him and give them all they need, Just for him to do what God has called him to do?
Are we willing to die to ourselves so that others can rise trough our suffering?

Christians= Christ like..
ILLL kemm hi kbira dik il kelma... before boasting your a christian look at yourself and see if what your doing is uplifting others or yourself...

Attenti! no easy task!

Blessings

ChAlLeNgEd

This past two weeks as we all were discussing about new years eve, stories from past parties came up, a few of when i got extremely drunk, fights etc!Well anyway as i just stated thats past!

Hekk God really was telling in these 2 days that i dont need to be that again.. even tough people thought it was funny and it was nice telling those stories now, showing how foolish i was when i was drunk..

Its past, Ive grown, im a new person in Christ now.. I took a new commitment to Love Christ with all i am, and before i took this commitment He died and rose up to give me new life so that whats past would be all removed from my history records!

Saul was then made into Paul!


Im determined not to let that thing happen again, not because christianity says so, but because if i drink ill fight and i want to love people because Christ is love! And i want to share what christ did for me with the rest of the world!

Im ready to go for it and look at NYE in a different way! From a disciple of Jesus point of view :)

i have been called to.....

Writing to most Christians...

Do you ever recall instances when you feel that God has really called you to do something? and in time either because it was not time yet, or you needed to grow deeper in Jesus, or else because time passed and you simply haven't done anything about it?

Do you remember how passionate we used to pray when we first became Christians? How many hours we used to read the bible? How we enjoyed listening to older Christians speak about their faith? or how much we loved to learn about our God?

Have we sometimes forgotten about our one true Love? or just taken him for grunted? Have we allowed our calling slip away? or have we left it there until we think we can settle our lives?

This morning i just finished a book by Barry woodworth, Once an addict. This guy was a heavy drug user and also a dealer, in and out of prison. During one night whilst he was still a heavy drug user and he got mentally ****** always hearing voices. He felt prompted by God to go to a town, He was definatley on drugs but he knew God had called him to this place so he stripped nakes crossed a river and knocked at a place he thought he was called to. Obviously the lady who opened called the police seeing a man naked who wanted to come in.

Years later he found himself in a church with his neighbour, and there was an alter call( he had forgotten about being called) and he was healed of his addictions, After some weeks studying the bible and praying he understood his calling and it was to become an evangelist. He enrolled in a Bible school, whilst on his way there he realised it was a few blocks away from were he was called by God in the first time!

Sometimes its Good to allow God to take care of our calling, but when he tells us its time.. are we willing to let go? let go off our securities in life? Living 100% for God? Its a definatly hard thing to do. But this thought of letting everything go was haunting me all morning, untill i realised who my earthly securities are... but am i willing to let them go and follow his calling?.....

I hope that you take your calling seriously and ask you to take time out to think who God is in your life.. is he the pilot or your co pilot?

my prayer and my addiction...

Hey guys long time no post,

How have you all been? I must say on my side quite a lot of things happened. The youth weekend was a weekend filled with new insights.

My prayer,
Lately this is what i pray and sing daily, apart from psalm 25 which i love very much and i would like to share it with you..


Open our eyes
To see the things that make Your heart cry
To be the church that You would desire
Your light to be seen

Break down our pride
And all the walls we’ve built up inside
Our earthly crowns and all our desires
We lay at Your feet

Let hope rise
And darkness tremble
In Your holy light
That every eye will see
Jesus our God
Great and mighty to be praised


god of all days
Glorious in all of Your ways
Oh the majesty the wonder and grace
In the light of Your Name

With everything
With everything
We will shout for Your glory
With everything
With everything
We will shout forth Your praise

Our hearts they cry
Be glorified
Be lifted high above all names
For You our King
With everything
We will shout forth Your praise



I guess you all recognised the song :) Make it your prayer too.. and hekk i encourage all you guys to keep praying, we are free and we are not undergoing harsh persecution but we can never say when that will end and we will have to worship God in hidden places.

My addiction,

Im an addict, i used to love it before then i stopped but now im totally addicted, i dream about it and all i think is about it!
My books :S yes it might sound strange but lately im getting extra addicted to books, Reading constantly when ever i have a chance.. that isnt the bad part but at night i read in my sleep, i dream of reading and i read whole pages like litteral words lol ... haha i need a good night out 3 days till the weekend :P

Throne..

Lets get ready, lets get excited, lets rejoice Because God will do Awesome stuff this weekend!!! Lets our hearts be prepared to meet our living God! Lets come to this weekend with an expectant heart let it not just be a weekend of fun but a weekend which will change our lives totally!! Lets all pray for the people setting up and involved in the prep of this weekend, let there be no injuries and i pray that hell keep us united as one family, one church! i also ask you guys to pray for the equipment! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh excitment!!

THE END....

It has finally come to an end. The second summer of Mustard seed.
Today i was really feeling bad knowing that i could have done so much more to make Mustard seed a place where Christian's can meet and bring friends and talk to them about Jesus.
I think i could have prayed much more for it, then taking it 'for grunted'...

I pray that the seed's planted will grow. And i'm sure God did great things trough my nothingness.. I pray for all those who served that what they have given, time and smiles, God will repay them with endless joy and peace.

Hekk i really hope i learn how to serve more in love. Loving more instead of getting all angry and pissy :)
I have to thank Bettina for helping me out on this hehe she was always telling me not to shout and be more loving :) Thanks Bett.

I also want to thank Sam.. Brother you've helped me keep focused when i lost all hope in this project! If it wasnt for my brother i would have never managed, the hours spent at lidl the crazy stuff and the excitment he had haha ill never forget them..

Also Special thanks to Kevin and Leana this summer who helped me and supported me, and listened to me grumbling and moaning and teaching me :)

Tutzi, Stefan and the rest of the youth team, Thanks for your constant prayers! This was a team effort! Praying, pastoral teachings, love, support, and cooking :)
And to the rest who helped in any way a Big thanks for helping us out in planting mustard seeds in everyones hearts :)

Lets dream big.. we had a small seed (small kitchen, small cafe area, no fridge) and now it will grow into a big project just like the mustard tree :)

Any way im off to sleep.. been a long day

God bless ya all

Signing off with the video promo of mustard seed of last year .. Enjoy

Macho

Since i was always left alone dealing with my problems and being a guy i always tend to take the situation in my hand and not trusting God or getting worked up over everything. But yesterday it was amazing for the first time i was in front of Jesus and i let my baggage at his feet and just stood still in awe of his love.. Its not that i didnt trust God but it was like no God wont take everything or i cant give him this problem i can solve it by myself.. but its really not.. i become nervous, i literally at times become an ass to those around me.. and i was just there standing with my hands down just seeing God taking it all away.

this video really explains it all..

I know God has something great prepared.. He wants me to make my tent even bigger so that he can fill it up even more.. More love..
Get deep in the word guys